An Answer
From Welcome to Keystone Novel 12: What’s Wrong With Me?: Chapter 13, Scene 4
Even though her parents had just made the exact opposite choice of Cahuenga’s father and decided that she didn’t need any treatment for the symptoms that had been ailing her, about an hour after the Citrus Grand Hospital had called with the results of her MRI, Kaitlin sat on her bed once again feverishly searching her health book for the diagnosis that all of the doctors and nurses whom she had recently seen just couldn’t seem to fathom. “Keri Ann said that what happened to me on Wednesday afternoon might’ve been a panic attack,” she reminded herself as she reached the end of a chapter about stress that hadn’t told her anything that she didn’t already know. “So maybe there’s something about that in here that will help me figure out what’s going on.”
Taking a deep breath, Kaitlin flipped back to her book’s table of contents and began to carefully scan the list of chapter titles and subtopics. But before she could come across anything that might be worth reading next, the door of her bedroom opened, and Marisa wandered into the room dressed in sneakers, black leggings that had white polka dots printed on them, and a baggy white long-sleeve off-the-shoulder top that had thin black stripes and a picture of Minnie Mouse, who was dressed in red-violet heels, a red-violet sundress that had white polka dots printed on it, and a matching bow, printed on it.
“Hey, Katie,” said Marisa as she wandered over to Kaitlin’s bed. “Do you still have your Disney songs CD?”
Frowning as her little sister stopped beside the bed, Kaitlin confusedly looked up from her book. “Yeah,” she slowly replied. “Why?”
“Because I need it,” replied Marisa. Holding up the Belle Barbie doll that she had carried into the room with her, she continued with, “See, it’s time for Belle and the Beast to dance.” She shook her head. “But they can’t dance without music, so I need that CD because it has their special song on it. So can I have it?”
As her little sister stood staring at her with wide hopeful eyes, Kaitlin sighed. “Fine,” she said as she reluctantly set her health book aside and then turned to swing her legs over the opposite side of her bed. “Just as long as you don’t scratch it up, okay?”
Marisa agreeably nodded. “Don’t worry, Katie,” she said, absentmindedly flipping through the pages in Kaitlin’s health book as her sister stood up, pulled open the top drawer of her bookshelf, and started to rummage through it. “Allison is in our room, so she can put the music in the CD player for me.”
“Great,” said Kaitlin, approvingly nodding as she pulled the CD from her drawer and turned back to her sister. “Now just make sure that one of you brings it back when you’re done with it, okay?”
As Kaitlin held the CD out to her, Marisa grinned. “We will,” she promised as she reached out and grabbed the CD case out of her sister’s hand. “Thanks, Katie!”
Kaitlin just nodded. “Uh-huh,” she muttered, crossing her arms over her chest as Marisa turned and began to hurry back to the door with her long hair, which was pushed back with a black stretch headband that had a bow on the side and white polka dots printed on it, flying behind her. “We’ll see about that. Because usually, whenever you guys borrow something from me, I have to go into your black hole of a room and find it myself when I decide that I want it back.”
Letting out a heavy sigh as the bedroom door slammed shut behind Marisa, Kaitlin turned back to her bed and then carefully climbed onto it again. After settling back against her pillows, she pulled her health book back into her lap to resume searching for topics that sounded as if they might lead to an explanation about the weird symptoms that she had suddenly developed.
But when Kaitlin looked down at the pages in front of her, she realized that she was no longer looking at the table of contents. Instead, she was looking at a couple of pages that Marisa had randomly flipped to. Pages that were titled with the word “Depression”.
“Depression,” muttered Kaitlin. “That’s another word for sad. Sad like I’ve been for a while now. So could this be it? Could this be what’s wrong with me?”
Focusing her eyes on the page, Kaitlin cleared her throat and began to read. “‘Depression is a serious mental health condition characterized by extreme sadness that lasts for an extended period of time,’” she softly read out loud to herself. ‘“People who are suffering from it often experience the following symptoms: Overeating or loss of appetite, loss of interest in family, friends, and previously enjoyed activities, frequent crying spells, isolation and loss of energy, irritability, and sleep difficulties.”’
“Oh my God,” muttered Kaitlin, a look of horror forming on her face as she slowly looked up from her book. “I have all of these. I have loss of appetite since I haven’t been real hungry lately, and I don’t feel like doing a lot of the things I used to like to do anymore. I also cry over things that didn’t used to make me cry now, and I’m tired and find a lot of things annoying now too. So is this it? Could I really have depression? And if I do, what am I supposed to do to get better?”
Looking back down at the book, Kaitlin let her eyes drift down to the paragraph that was printed underneath the list of symptoms that she had just read. “‘If you have been experiencing these symptoms for more than a month,”’ she continued reading, ‘“you should get help. A friendly teacher or guidance counselor can help you in your time of need. If possible, you can also see a psychologist.”’
Looking up from the book again, Kaitlin sighed. “Well, I don’t think that’s going to happen,” she muttered. “Especially since I’ve already been to a nurse, a doctor, and the hospital, and none of those people found anything wrong with me. So who can I go to and get help with this?”
As Kaitlin sat wracking her brain for someone who might finally take her seriously and help her get the kind of treatment she needed in order to overcome what she was now pretty sure was the correct diagnosis for her symptoms, a memory from Friday night suddenly flashed into her mind…
“So what’s wrong with me, Keri Ann?” Kaitlin pitifully whimpered. “Why am I so miserable all of the time now? And how do I…” she swallowed hard again, “how do I make it stop?”
As Kaitlin gave her a pleading and desperate look, Keri Ann helplessly shook her head. “I don’t know,” she replied, leaning in and pulling Kaitlin into a comforting hug. “But I promise you, Kate,” she said, stroking Kaitlin’s hair as her sister began to sob into her shoulder, “I’m going to help you find out. Whatever it takes, we’re going to find out what’s going on with you and figure out the best way to fix it so that you can be happy again.”
“Keri Ann,” muttered Kaitlin as the memory faded as quickly as it had come. “She promised that she would help me. And so far, she’s been the only one who’s thought that something different that no one else is seeing is going on with me. So if I go to her and show her this stuff about depression, then she should be able to help me get whatever I need to make it go away, right?”
Deciding that she had nothing further to lose when she already felt so terrible, Kaitlin set her book down on her comforter, swung her legs over the side of her bed, and stood up again. Then she began to determinedly head for her door, hoping against hope that her older sister would indeed be able to help her get whatever assistance she needed to get well again.
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